Freaky Xrays

what's not to love about them?



Many more where that came from. How did this one get in there? Baby. The other white meat.

Sarah Palin Pardons a Turkey

it doesn't get much funnier than this

Sarah Palin did that silly thing that every Governor does around Thanksgiving and pardoned a turkey. Afterward, she gave an interview while another turkey gets stuffed into a grinder in the background. Priceless!



Her attitude is perfect. I'm looking forward to the rebuilding of the Republican Party with her leading the way.

Anyway, I wanted to make a flash movie with her giving the interview with some cartoon violence going on in the background. Unfortunately, I couldn't find any suitable cartoon clips for it and I'm not sure I would have been able to pull it off anyway. So I settled for this:

Al Franken, Norm Coleman, Hanging Chad

good grief

Once again, I'm taking things off of Rachel Lucas's blog. I can't help myself. I get inspired. I have to say that it was nice to see her slowly come out of politics blogging retirement for her latest post. Granted, the post was more against stupidity than about politics, but aren't the two mutually exclusive more times than not?

The recount is underway in Minnesota and there is bickering over smudges and eraser marks reminisceint of hanging chads. sigh. If you are a Pittsburgh Steelers fan (and I see no reason why you wouldn't be) you will remember a certain Thanksgiving day coin toss involving Jerome Bettis a few years ago. He called Tails, the official said he called Heads, hillarity ensued. When you go to the tape there is a barely perceptable hhh sound before he called tails, so it was more like "Hh-Tails!", but come on! Anyway, the ballots are kind of like that.

Go over to Rachel's and look at some of the contested ballots. Between uninformed voters and immoral campaigns the American Election Process has become something beyond ridiculous.

Obamas Will Not Get Puppy Before White House Move

one promise, one fail

President-elect Barack Obama said on Election Night that he had promised his young daughters that they could get a dog once the race was over.

He can't even keep promises to his kids, where does that leave the American People? I'm not serious, of course ... but that is the type of thing that Bush would have been called out on.

I read last week that a canine club in Peru offered the Obama's a Peruvian hairless dog. His older daughter suffers from allergies, so a hairless dog would solve that problem.

I don't feel comfortable with that. It would be too similar to a certain evil doctor with a penchant for hairless pets.


No Obama, we don't gnaw on kittehs ear!

Artists stage street scenes to lurk in Google maps

I don't get it

I found this article today. It peaked my interest. Mainly because it occurred in my hometown of Pittsburgh, PA.

PITTSBURGH — Anyone using Google's Street View map feature to scan one downtown Pittsburgh street is bound to do a double-take.

Two 17th century swordsmen doing battle? An escape from a building using knotted sheets? A laser zapping a Steelers fan and a Cleveland Browns fan, rendering them love-struck and about to embrace?

[snip ...]

Google really did capture those scenes when it sent a car equipped with cameras down Pittsburgh's Sampsonia Way in May to take photographs for its online maps. But these images and most of the other scenes caught on Sampsonia were staged by artists Ben Kinsley and Robin Hewlett. The two set out to explore the boundaries of the real and virtual worlds after Pittsburgh became included in Street View.

So I went to Google Maps and typed "Sampsonia Way Pittsburgh, PA" in the address field. Here is a screenshot.



I don't get it. Maybe I'm just a stupid redneck from Western PA and don't have any art sense, but it just looks like a random street in Anytown, USA to me.

I mean you have a school, some trees, Wilford Brimely strangling a guy, a fence, some buildings ... Nothing special, and certainly not anything I would call "art". I feel cheated.

Obama Apologizes to Nancy Reagan for Seance Comment

non heinous

From Fox News:

At a news conference in Chicago, Obama said he had spoken with all the living presidents as he prepares to take office in January. Then he smiled and said, "I didn't want to get into a Nancy Reagan thing about doing any seances."

Some of the right wing online community are trying to get worked up over this. Come on, really? Let's wait for him to do something truly offensive so as not to be accused of crying wolf too many times.

That isn't to say I won't be making fun of him:


President elect Barack Obama revealed his inexperience last night when, during a seance, he conjured a character from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. His intended target was late President Abraham Lincoln.

Yeah, I know, pretty weak. I was going for pure silliness. I got the idea from the caption contest at The Gone Rick Motel. In the photo, Obama looks like he is trying to conjure something. Combine that with the seance story and it just seemed like the right thing to do.

Here is the original photo and my caption, before I tied the seance story with it:


Will somebody answer the damn phone? What time is it anyway?

Also, just for the heck of it, here is a scene from Bill and Ted. Enjoy:

Marine vet at Russell rally: Murtha a fat little bastard

i don't respect his authori-tye

You just gotta love this:

During the rally, Shawn Bryan, a former sergeant in the U.S. Marine Corps., said Murtha visited his unit in Iraq in 2005. At the time, Murtha told the troops "what a great job we did," Bryan said, only to see him tell his district back home he no longer supported the effort.

Bryan said he didn't put his life on the line for his country "just so some fat little bastard can come back and run his mouth."

John Murtha has called Western Pennsylvanians racists. He has called us rednecks. He has called active Marines cold-blooded killers. Who does this guy represent? Not me.



Also,
David Drake: Murtha A Fat Little Bastard
The Jawa Report: Marine Vet At Russell Rally: Murtha a Fat Little Ba***rd
Wizbang: Marine Vet: Murtha a "Fat Little Bastard"

The Three Amigos

badges? we don't need no stinking badges!



The RNC better not have put this in a commercial too! **shakes fist**

The Three Stooges

nyuk, nyuk, nyuk



Update:
After I made this, I happened onto Hot Air and wouldn't you know they had this video up?



And I thought I was being so clever. Not really, I was actually thinking it was so obvious but made it anyway.

India launches first moon mission

lunar slurpee's now available

India launched it's first moon mission today. By all accounts it was a success and building has already begun on the moon's surface.



On tap for the next launch? Spokespeople say they will tie some fiber optic cable to the rocket and they should be able to start fielding technical support calls by the end of the month.

Ayers, Obama Relationship Runs Deeper Than Suspected

best friends



New photos uncovered that show convicted terrorist William Ayers and Presidential hopeful Barack Obama have known each other far longer than initially believed.

Mrs. Crabtree, a former nanny of the rambunctious toddlers is quoted as saying, "Those little rascals were always up to something on the playground! If one of the other children would build a nicer sandcastle, William would knock it down! He just couldn't stand it if someone had nicer things than him."

When asked about the behavior of a young Barack Obama, Mrs. Crabtree recalls, "Don't even get me started about him! During snack time he would make all the other kids put their treats into a pile, and then he would distribute a little to each. Somehow he always came away with more than everyone else!"

We will be following this story very closely.

Joe the Plumber, Obama Poster Photoshop

stop the lies



Make your own poster here.

Fail!

epic fail

Classic Movie Scenes

celluloid don't lie



A real tear jerker. I said tear, dammit, stop snickering.

The inspiration for this came from the time that Wilford Brimley may or may not have had relations with a puma. Take a look at these 5 cats that look like Wilford Brimley and judge for yourself.

The background image comes from the classic Canteen Boy and the Scout Master SNL skit.

Another Newly Released Photo of Kim Jong Il

the man gets around



Yep, still looks crazy to me.

Incidentally, here's a fun fact. My inspiration for this was the wacky sports fan who showed up at all the major sporting events back in the seventies, wearing that wig. For some reason I associate him with the Houston Astros. It just now dawned on me that this is most likely due to the tacky rainbow uniforms the Astros wore in that era.

Anyway, via The Love of Sport's 10 Most Famous Sports Fans article I learned this:

With his rainbow-colored afro wig and John 3:16 signs, Rollen Stewart stood out from the crowd at numerous nationally televised sporting events during the late ‘70s and ‘80s. Rainbow Man was spotted at the World Series, the Indy 500, the Kentucky Derby, the NBA Finals, the Olympics and even made an appearance at the wedding of Princess Diana and Prince Charles. He was even parodied by Christopher Walken in a “Saturday Night Live” skit. Stewart’s now serving three consecutive life sentences for kidnapping. I wonder how he wears his hair for the boys in the joint.

Who woulda thunk that guy wasn't right in the head?

North Korea Releases Pictures of Kim Jong Il

in all his poofy glory

This is the first footage of the reclusive ruler released since August 14th. This comes amidst U.S. plans to remove North Korea from a terrorism blacklist.

Finally, some good news. I guess they must have really given up their evil ways over there in North Korea. Let me be the first to welcome the Norks into what I hope to be a long and prosperous era of peace between our nations.

Here is one of the newly released photos.



Wait a minute. What is that in the background? Is that ....? My God! Is that Alex Baldwin in a cage!?!? It is!!! Kim Jong Il hasn't stopped being evil! I don't even want to think about the things he has been doing to one of our biggest Hollywood stars.

Alex does seem to be in good spirits. What a brave man. What courage he is showing by managing a "buddy Christ" style pose under those conditions.

We can only hope that the reports are true and Kim Jong Il has a bad case of the diabeetus. I'm sure I don't have to remind anyone what happens to eastern savages who don't check their blood sugar.

Snake-Oil Salesman

get 'em while they're hot

I actually thought this one up before I found the snake in my basement today. Funny how it provided a nice segue.

The Brothers Obama

smile and say arugula

Right Wing News posted an interview with Barack Obama's brother. It is not very flattering. You can bet the Obama campaign is going to do everything it can to keep this from becoming a hot topic.

Well, I can't let them do that. I decided to poke around a bit. Not surprisingly, I was able to access his Yahoo account with relative ease.

Username: Neo999374
Password: hopechangetax

Got it on the first try actually. Change password tricks are for noobs!!! Sickburn!!!

I uncovered this picture. Disgusting. What you see here is a recent photo of Barack and his brother. I thought you haven't seen your brother since childhood? Chalk this up as just another lie from the Chosen One.

Is this the man we want running our country? Is this the man we want sheltering our poor? Look at him, his belly probably full of arugula and waffles while his brother, his own flesh and blood, has to survive on peanut butter and crack sandwiches. Is this man fit to be our next President? I think not.

Hope For the Best

but plan to beg for change

Long winded speeches, full of hope and change, yet somehow devoid of detail. The grueling primaries gave us more debates than I care to count. Still, Obama kept his cards close to his chest, like a stony faced poker player, refusing to offer the slightest tell of what his actual policies would look like.

Maybe we underestimated him? The media has been telling us all along how utterly brilliant he is. Maybe they were right and we were wrong?

Today Obama lay down one of his cards. In a small school room setting he articulated his plan for the economy. He demonstrated, so succinctly, his plan that there remains no question what an Obama Presidency will mean for our economic future.



Personally, I would have went for plan A. Good thing I'm not running for President.

Btw, All American Blogger added me to their Directory of Blogs today. W00t!! I'm buzzworthy.

Slick Willy in the Hen House

he felt their pain

Bill Clinton was on The View today. Heh. What were the producers thinking? What's next? Michael Jackson on Sesame Street? I couldn't find a picture, so I made one myself.



Bawbwa Wawa was bwefless. Whoopie was angry. Bill left a stain on the couch.

In other news, I'm going to go ahead and start spending some of those theoritical Internet dollars now because they are as good as mine. Read 'em and weep.